Joseph: A Man of Christ-Like Character
How to Respond to Unfaithfulness [The Forgotten Hero, Pt.1]
Joseph was a simple man working as a carpenter some eighty miles from his hometown, Bethlehem.
There, he met a pretty, little lady by the name of Mary, and they became betrothed (or engaged) (Matthew 1:18a).
“When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph” (Matthew 1:18a ESV).
Things were good, but there wasn’t anything particularly special about the couple. They were destined to become an average working-class family in a below-average town (Nazareth), but excitement filled the air as preparations were made for the wedding.
According to Jewish tradition, during that time, the couple would spend the year apart.
The Pregnancy
During that year, Joseph received devastating news about his new fiancee. Mary was pregnant.
“[B]efore they came together she was found to be with child” (Matthew 1:18b).
I’m sure never in a million years did Joseph anticipate Mary being unfaithful. I can only imagine what emotions he must have felt: anger, regret, shame, and a deep sense of betrayal.
Why is this happening to me?
He must have also heard the news about Mary’s visit from the angel, Gabriel, and the explanation of her pregnancy, but would you have believed such a story?
Joseph’s Response
Instead of lashing out in anger, Joseph protected Mary — his “unfaithful” wife-to-be.
“And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly” (Matthew 1:19 ESV).
His broken heart and the shame of being cheated on would not allow him to marry her, but his love would not allow him to destroy her (the penalty of adultery was death).
Joseph protected, but I’m sure it tormented him.
I imagine that Joseph lay awake unable to sleep that night. Hours, or even days, passed with little to no rest as he wrestled with it.
Who was the father? It’s not like they were living in a bustling metropolis. Nazareth was a small town, barely on the map. I’m sure he had ideas.
How to avoid the shame of it all? Again, being that Nazareth was such a small town, it wouldn’t be long before everyone knew. Maybe Joseph thought about where he could move to get a fresh start.
Even the most troubling of situations cannot hold back sleep for too long. Joseph finally dozed off into a much-needed deep sleep.
The Dream
“But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” (Matthew 1:20–21 ESV, emphasis added).
Had Joseph been a man of inferior character — had he reacted emotionally— would he have received such a dream from the angel? Many other men would have burned the house down before going to bed that night, but because Joseph was a man with Christ-like character — slow to anger and full of grace — God had an opportunity to speak.
On one hand, I imagine that dream must have been a great relief. She wasn’t lying. The story about the angel and the Holy Spirit was true. She hadn’t been unfaithful after all.
However, with the truth came a new dilemma.
Mary was faithful, but she was still pregnant with a child everyone would know to be “illegitimate.” To divorce her would be easier. By divorcing her, he could avoid the mess that was sure to come. So what did Joseph do?
Joseph’s Obedience
Joseph chose to believe and obey the dream, even though it meant that he had to bear the shame of marrying an “unfaithful” woman and raising an “illegitimate child.”
Have you ever wondered why none of Joseph’s family took them in as they arrived in Bethlehem? Not even a distant cousin was willing to sleep on the floor so Mary could have a bed. Joseph, his bride, and his soon-to-be-born son were rejected by his entire family due to the shameful circumstances of the pregnancy.
That was just the beginning. Through the years, Joseph must have faced constant rumors and gossip about his “adulterous wife” and “illegitimate son.” It must have broken his heart to see his children struggle with malicious neighborhood talk about their brother. He must have fought tirelessly to protect his family.
What great strength it must have taken to remain faithful and obedient to that dream many years ago.
Not much is said of Joseph in scripture. He’s primarily known for being the husband of Mary and the father of Jesus. We treat him like an extra in a movie, and in doing so, we fail to see how truly remarkable He was as a man, a husband, and a dad.
God knew that He needed a man with Christ-like character to father the Christ-child. In Joseph, He found that.
Yes, Mary was a woman of great faith who found “favor with God” (Luke 1:30), but Joseph was an equally admirable man. Had he not been, what would have become of Mary and the unborn savior?
Together, Mary and Joseph were called and chosen by God to build a home and a family, through which God would send His Son to save the world.
Is it possible to be famous yet forgotten?
I believe so. Joseph is the forgotten hero. He may be overshadowed by his wife and Son, but he is a true giant in the faith — unrivaled by any man in history.
Our Response: Putting Feet to Faith
Nearly every day of our lives, we are faced with a decision between grace and justice.
People, both friends and strangers, will harm you. It may be from harsh, unhelpful criticism or a sarcastic joke. It may be from a direct shot or passive aggression. It may be unintentional or outright betrayal.
We cannot control the actions of others, but we can control how we respond. Men and women of high character live above their circumstances.
Every act of “unfaithfulness” is an opportunity for grace and forgiveness.
Resist the urge to respond emotionally and to exercise your rights. Respond with Christ-like character, and in doing so, you may be ushering in the greatest miracle (and blessing) of your life.
How will you respond to “unfaithfulness” this week?
Read Part 2 Here: Joseph: A Man Led by the Spirit
